We yell for the Government to balance the budget, and then take the last dime we have to make the down payment on a car that will take 5 years to pay off.
We demand speed laws that will stop fast driving and then we won’t buy a car if it can’t go over 100 miles an hour.
We know the line-up of every team in the American and National Leagues but mumble through half the words our national anthems.
We’ll spend half a day looking for vitamin pills to make us live longer, then drive 90 miles an hour on a slick pavement to make up for lost time.
We tie up our dog while letting our sixteen-year-old son run wild.
We will work hard on a farm so we can move into town where we can make more money so we can move back to the farm.
We get upset we’re spending over a billion dollars for education, but spend three billion dollars a year for cigarettes.
In the office, we talk about baseball, shopping or fishing, but when we are out at the game, the mall or on the lake, we talk about business.
We’re supposed to be the most civilized Christian place on earth, but we still can’t deliver payrolls without an armored car.
We have more experts on marriage than any other country in the world and still have more divorces.
We’re the country that has more food to eat than any other country in the world and more diets to keep us from eating it.