For many years, and even know, I struggle with my self-esteem and possessing confidence. There are several different drivers of our self-esteem, but the definition is confidence in one’s own worth or abilities; self-respect.
In fact, my self-esteem was so low that I would purposely avoid going certain places or talking to people. I made sure that I did not interact with anything outside of my comfort zone. This method of dodging ensured that I would not look stupid with my vulnerabilities exposed.
For a little while, it didn’t go too bad. Shortly later, I became infuriated with myself. I really wanted to do activities and speak with a bunch of different people and I was too afraid. For an example, my first year of college I did not talk to anyone because I was too scared of rejection and humiliation. I desired to make new friends, but something inside of me was holding me back.
Finally, I got so fed up with myself that I decided to intentionally force myself to encounter uncomfortable circumstance. Whenever my first instinct would be to sheepishly avoid something I knew I had to do it even more. In doing so, I felt so much more free!
I learned it is invaluable to let desire determine your actions, not your fears.
By letting your desires control what you do you can accomplish so many more things than you would imagine.
Benefits of Leading With Desires
Works on social skills-Doing things outside of your comfort zone forces you into situations you are not accustomed to. Therefore, your social skills are developed by necessity.
Improves communication-Along with social skills comes communication. If you are a bad communicator, exhibiting circumstances out of the usual sharpens communication skills.
Let’s you be vulnerable-Being a newbie at something is a great way for you to practice lowering your walls around people. This is where fellowship is really created.
Introduces new perspectives into your life-Participating in different things than you usually would allow you to observe different people, cultures, ideas, and thoughts. In return, it widens your own opinions, thoughts and perspective about life.
Builds confidence– Just as people who hate presenting in front of people have to keep practicing in order to become more comfortable so does stepping outside of your comfort zone. The more you choose to do it the more confidence your gain and the easier it is to do it.
Strengthens your persistence– Sometimes you are going to fail or embarrass yourself, but that is life, everyone does at some point. True character is developed when you keep trying regardless.
Free’s up your life– Not being so cowardly makes me feel so much better about myself. It also enables me to do whatever I want even though I am nervous or intimidated. Being able to look fear in the eyes and pursue something anyways is one of the most freeing things.
Jesus Provides an Excellent Example For Not Letting Fear Cripple Us
Many people there is no way Jesus can relate to us now-a-days, but I think he is the only one who can truly know what we are going through.
Jesus looks death, probably one of every human’s worst fears, in the eyes and conquers it. Jesus knew he was placed on this Earth to ultimately die to pay for our sins. For 33 years, he knew ultimate fate on the cross. Most people would not be able to live life normally knowing that, but Jesus did.
He trusted God. When the guards came to arrest him he did not even fight back. Jesus let them take him for he knew it was God’s plan. Then the third day after his death he rose from the dead as prophesized throughout the old testament.
Jesus defeated death! What else should we be afraid of? If we believe that Jesus is our Savior died and rose again to save us from our sins so that we could spend eternity with Him in heaven, then why should any fear paralyze us from stepping into unknown waters (1 Corinthians 15:4)?