I am extremely introverted and struggle with meeting new people intentionally, whereas my husband could walk up to a complete stranger and have an easy conversation.
I would say that I am extremely more social now that I’m married to this man than I was as a single woman.
The reason why? My husband is a great example of Jesus to follow.
The Hard Part of Having a Community-Oriented Husband
1. The most difficult part of having an extrovert as a spouse is that he is always wanting to have people over at our house.
I love to have weekends that are spent just the two of us as it is refreshing and fun.
He likes those days too, but he always thinks about who we can have over and when.
2. Another difficult part of having an extroverted spouse is that he always wants to get to places early and to stay late.
My husband does not like to miss an opportunity to visit with someone, even if he sees them at other times during the week.
He admitted to one of our community groups that it bothers him when I cause us to be late to something even when it’s not a big deal.
Five minutes early to the event is ten minute late on his watch. The reason why? He wants enough time to talk to people.
He also likes to stay at least ten minutes after to continue talking to people.
That wears me out sometimes.
3. Furthermore, it is difficult having an extroverted spouse who is always up for more of something.
My husband is really always up for anything. After we are finished with one event, he suggests for us to go over to his parent’s or sisters’ house to play games or to hang out.
At those points, I just want to get home and pet my cats.
It’s a struggle for me to be a pleasant person with my in-laws when my husband is dragging me along from place to place.
Even when we are at my grandparents’ house, he could play games all day, whereas I can only handle so many in a row before I need a break to watch TV or take a nap.
And Now the Helpful Things
1. Having an extroverted spouse challenges me with my social skills
Even though I do not prefer to talk to people even when I become burnt out, it is an important skill for me to practice.
When I’m thrown into those situations, it is nice to have a wonderful example to follow.
For example, one time my husband and I were caught in a conversation after an event. We were both tired, but he still gave all of his attention to the person we were talking with.
The key for him was selflessness. This person’s conversation was more important than how tired he was.
2. Having an extroverted spouse introduces me to new, interesting people.
I would not know half of the people that I know now if it was not for my husband.
He introduced me to BLOC Ministries where I met a bunch of the underclassmen at Cincinnati Christian University (my Alma Mater).
Now, several people I pass in the halls talk to me and we even have inside jokes with each other!
I also want to mention how I’ve gotten to know many of the families in the community of Price Hill as well.
3. Having an extroverted spouse increases my endurance for interacting with people.
Now that I have had a great example to follow, it has rubbed off on me!
There are some times when I just want to go out and hang out with other people!
It’s a sign that I am definitely growing in my social life.
Even after spending time in our small group, I wanted to find out if his parents wanted to play games or watch a movie.
Look to Similar Examples in Your Life
If you do not have a spouse that is a great example of being part of a community, scan through your list of friends, pick one, and start hanging out with them.
If you do not have anyone to follow in this regard, ask a spiritually mature person in your church to become your accountability partner.
Basically, if you aren’t hanging out with people that think being part of a community is important to spiritual growth, find people who are.
This can be done by joining a small group at church, playing an inter-mural sport with an organization, or even joining a gym.
The bottom line is that we all have a choice to jump in or sit out. It’s not a bad thing to sit out–especially for introverted people.
But, it is equally important for everyone to come together and to help each other grow in their walk with the Lord.
For more community, worship with us here at the Inbound Church <–Click!