7 min read

Theme: How to become like Jesus?

Topic: “Who is your hero?”

Essay style: Definition essay.

          Final draft.  

        Most people have a hero and they want to be a hero. I am the same as others. When I think about a hero, several questions come up in my mind “Who is the hero?”, “Who can become a hero?” or “Is hero not a superhuman?”. Now, it is about time to find out the answers.

First, “Who is the hero?”. The dictionary gives the definition of hero like this “Hero is a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements or noble qualities.” or “a person of superhuman qualities and often semi-divine origin”.

I agree with the dictionary, but I think hero must do the right thing in morality and against the unrighteousness. Hero should not limit only human or god or superhuman. How about animals. I heard a story told about a dog that help people who were going to die in Alaska. In my opinion, it could be called a hero as well.

        Second, “Who can become a hero?” The qualifications of hero may be courage, strong physical body or has a
supernatural power but I think the most important factor could be a public
consciousness. The desire of doing the things for human’s society not for
individual benefits. Even though, you are the strongest one in the World, but
you do the thing by your own benefit, you are not a hero.

        Jesus is a good example of an ideal hero. He is not only courage and has a miracle power as superhuman but also unselfish. Jesus devotes himself for mankind, he travels across the region by walking, preaches the different of God and Evil, forgiving human’s sin and helping disabled people. Moreover, he sacrifices his life to help people and his disciples. Jesus does everything for mankind not for himself that is why billion of people in the World revere and believe in Jesus’s word.

         In my opinion, everyone can become the hero for someone in some ways. We do not need to fight terrorists or donate all your money to help starve people in the third-world countries. Just we have the courage to do the right things in moral and avoid the unethical things. Just providing the seat for elderly people or children, donating several dollars for non-profit organization or giving some
help to homeless people.

         Giving things, making people happiness and protecting the right thing are the easiest way for us to change normal people to a hero. Jesus, please give me a courage like you. God bless me.

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             Friend review

  1.     It is easy to read.
  2.    Your essay explains step by step.
  3.    You have minor grammatical errors.
  4.    Be aware to do not put more your opinion in a definitive style.

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Second draft

        Many people have a hero and want to be a hero. I am the same as others. When I think about heroes, several questions come up in my mind “Who is the hero?” , “Who can become a hero?” or “Is hero not a superhuman?”. Now, it is about time to find out the answer.

        First, “Who is the hero?”. The dictionary gives the definition of hero like this “Hero is a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements or noble qualities.” or “a person of superhuman qualities and often semi-divine origin”.

         I agree with the dictionary but I think hero must do the right thing in morality and against the unrighteousness. Heroes should not limit only human or god or superhuman. How about animals. I heard a story told about a dog that help people who were going to die in Alaska. In my opinion, it can be called a hero as well.

          Second, “Who can become a hero?” The qualifications of hero may be courage, strong physical body or has a supernatural power but I think the most important factor could be a public consciousness. The desire to do the things for our society not for individual benefits. Even though, you are the strongest one in the world but you do the thing by your own benefit, you are not a hero.

           Jesus is a good example of an ideal hero. He is not only courage and has a miracle power as superhuman but also unselfish. Jesus devotes himself for mankind, he travels across the region by walking, preaches the different of God and Evil, forgiving human sin and helping disabled people. Moreover, he sacrifices his life to help people and his disciples. Jesus does everything for mankind not for himself that why billion people in the world revere and believe in Jesus word.

           In my opinion, everyone can become the hero for someone in some ways. We needn’t fight terrorists or donate all your money to help starvelling in the third-world countries. Just we have the courage to do the right things in moral and avoid the unethical things. Just providing the seat for elderly people or children, donating several dollars for non-profit organization or giving some help to homeless people.

           Giving things, Making people happiness and protecting the right thing are the easiest way for us to change normal people to a hero. Jesus, please give me a courage like you. God bless me.

_________________________________________

First draft

       Many people have a hero. Many people want to be a hero. I am the one that also have a hero and I want to be a hero in one way. When we think about the hero, several questions come up in my head  “Who can become a hero?” , “What is the hero?” or “Is hero not a superhuman?”. Now I will find the answers.

        First, What is the hero? Refer to the dictionary, hero definition is “a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements or noble qualities.” or “a person of superhuman qualities and often semi-divine origin”. And hero must do the right thing base on morality and against the unrighteousness.

       I agree with the dictionary but I think hero should not limit only human or god or superhuman. Some animals would be hero as well. I heard story told about a dog that help people in Alaska or a police dog that can help officers find a lost person. In my opinion, it can be called a hero as well.

         Second, Who can become a hero? The qualifications of hero may be courage, strong physical body but I think the most important factor is the will of unselfish. Even though, you are the strongest one in the world but you do the thing by your own benefit, you are not a hero.

         Jesus is a good example of an ideal hero. He is not only courage and has a miracle power as superhuman but also unselfish. Jesus devotes himself for mankind, he travels across the region by walking, preaches the different of God and Evil, forgiving human sin and helping disable people. Moreover, he sacrifices his life to help people and his disciples. Jesus does everything for mankind not for himself that why billion people in the world revere and believe in Jesus word.

           In my opinion, everyone can become the hero for someone in some ways. We needn’t to fight to terrorists or spent your all money to help people in the third-world countries. Just we have the courage to do the right things in moral and avoid the unethical things. Just providing the seat on the bus for elder people or children, donating several dollars for non-profit organization or giving some help to homeless people.

          Giving things, Making people happiness and protecting the right thing are the easiest way for us to change normal people to a hero. Jesus, please give me a courage like you. God bless me.